So here we are
again, the start of another brand new year.
The end of 2012 came and went, the earth didn't go up in flames, aliens
didn't land and we're all pretty much still here, getting on with it.
Just like every
January, this is when the guilt usually begins again.
"I must do such
and such this year, I can't believe how much I ate at Christmas and I got so
drunk on New Years eve, oh my!"
We look back at all
we failed to achieve last year, guiltily make some well-meaning New Years
Resolutions to lose weight, sign up for gym membership, try to spend more time with
the kids, all without really considering how we'll achieve our goals. Sadly most of us give
up after a couple of months and feel like a failure.
Well here's a
thought; maybe it's time to cut yourself some slack for a change instead.
Let me put it this
way. Guilt is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do, but it
doesn't get you anywhere.
Guilt is a pretty
negative emotion and not one I would encourage. I'm going to suggest that
instead, we could start each new year by counting our blessings, looking around
and truly seeing everything we have to be grateful for already.
This could be a
simple as being in good health, having a roof over your head and food to
eat. These simple things may not sound
like much, but believe me they would suddenly become very important indeed if
you didn't have them.
Why not try making a
list of all the things you have to be happy and grateful for this January
instead of a list of resolutions that you probably wont keep, and will then
beat yourself up about later.
Lets start the year
happy instead of guilty. If there are things you want to achieve, then pick a
time later in the year when the New Years Resolution madness has passed, and sit
down to do some proper goal setting.
Make sure there are
lots of easy, achievable steps to your goal so you don't get overwhelmed, or
better yet, find yourself a life coach (personally I work with the fabulous
Jacqueline Fairbrass) who will help you to make small, comfortable changes that
fit into your lifestyle.
You can always join the gym in February if you
still really want to. I'm sure it will still be there!
Here's wishing you a
Fantastic New Year, one and all. Guilt Free!
Helen, beautiful. I stopped making resolutions many years ago and I am in complete agreement about starting the year off with gratitude and in celebration of everything that we are, all that we have, and all that we've experienced and will experience. Thank you for sharing this!!! XO
ReplyDeleteI LOVE the metaphor of a rocking chair for guilt. Brilliant! It lulls us into thinking we're doing something but we go nowhere... Yesterday my husband and the kids and I sat down and shared what we want to manifest for 2013. It had the energy of teamwork - which is what all goals seem to need in order to become reality. It's harder to feel guilt when we've got the support of one another!
ReplyDeleteWe are so on the same wavelength with this, Helen! I wrote about doing something very similar on my blog and suggested that people use my Daily Yum practice. LOL!!
ReplyDeleteI say lets do something totally radical this year and make it all about embracing and accepting who we are rather than trying to change ourselves.
Shine Bright!
LOVE this Helen! Rocking chair as guilt = truly brilliant! And hooray to focusing on all that we had/have to be grateful for in 2012 instead of setting ourselves up for feeling like crap with over-the-top resolutions we can't keep! I say it's all about focusing on what you love to do, and feeling WOW, and the rest falls into place! :)
ReplyDeleteIt's unanimous! Counting our blessings on the new year or any days shifts the energy and our moods more powerfully than any other action we can take.. such a better substitute for resolutions which are made from fear and self-loathing.. and so cannot be sustained. I wrote my No More Weight Loss Resolutions post on my blog b/c like you, I know that there are better, kinder ways to move towards changes.. and like you said, small steps.. done with love and from a place of filled up with appreciation and gratitude, goes a long way.
ReplyDeleteLove to you,
Lisa
Love this Helen. Especially the guilt and rocking chair analogy. The only resolution I'm making this year is 'I resolve to be me'...acceptance of self as I am. Yeah baby!
ReplyDelete(Psst...and thank you for the lovely mention. Gentle change leads to permanent results. And you my dear, are making wonderful progress...but then it's all in you waiting for you to shine your light and share!)
Big hugs!
I decided mid-December to scratch the whole resolution nonsense. In the 20+ years I've been making them, I've yet to make even one a permanent change.
ReplyDeleteI'm ready to be grateful for who I am, and where I am, and how much I weigh, and take really good care of myself instead.
Agree, Helen, guilt is a very useless feeling. I think it's a great idea to start your year focusing on things that make you happy.
ReplyDeleteI don't make resolutions per se, but I write my goals, things that I want to achieve during the year, writing the down adds additional magic and keeps me focused.
I spent the whole December gym free, so I've chosen January as a starting point of taking care of myself, having physical exercises is one of the ways of doing it.