My Wake up Call

I was rudely awoken at 3:33am today by the fire alarms going off in my block. Bleary eyed, I clambered out of bed and  stumbled into the hallway to see what all the ruckus was about.

My mind racing, my first thought was which clothes to throw on, and how I was going to somehow evacuate both myself and my less-than-compliant  cat who hates being carried!

I was half expecting somebody to have burnt their dinner (again), but to my shock I discovered that the school next door on fire in a big way.  A neighbour was already in our hallway and told us that the fire was so intense that our smoke detectors had picked it up and triggered our alarm system. Fortunately our building was not affected, and we could stay put - for now.

I silently thanked the Angels for keeping us safe, and we hurried to the back windows to see the fire brigade on site battling huge orange flames on the roof of one building, a mere 20 feet or so away from us, spraying down water from atop a crane positioned overhead.

Photo taken from our back window

As the flames licked their way towards our building, our bathroom started to fill with the choking, acrid smoke which had seeped in through the extractor fan mounted on the back wall.

Well, at least we had discovered that our fire alarms worked in a real-life situation, so every cloud and all that...

One of our neighbours from a flat above us had been watching the unfortunate spectacle which had been going on for around 45 minutes at that point. She turned off the internal fire alarm system at the main control box to prevent us being deafened.

It was a particularly cold night with lows of minus 2 degrees C and smatterings of snow the previous day. Not the most clement of weather for an evacuation.

As I stood shivering in my pyjamas in our freezing cold hallway, it got me thinking. 

I'm not usually one to dwell on what-ifs, but the sheer intensity of the heat and flames leaping from the next door building, the destruction and seeming helplessness of the 35 fire fighters to do very much about it, put some things back into perspective for me. 

It reminded me just how fragile we are, how transient our existence and just how impermanent everything really is.

One minute here we are, carrying on with our lives and making such a fuss about silly little trivial things, then the next we can be gone, engulfed in a ball of flames like the unfortunate (although thankfully empty) school next to us.

It felt like a stark reminder not to sweat the small stuff, to remember what and whom really matter and not to lose sight of  the bigger picture. The small things, the trivia, the drama and gossip, the petty people who hurt us. None of these things really matter. All that matters is the people who care about us now, the people who stayed with us, the ones we love.
Our earth family.

I couldn't help but notice the precise time that the alarms went off in my block 3:33. The number Three relates to awareness, observation and the ability to reflect. Maybe the universe was trying to get my attention, to remind me what really matters in life. Recently I've found myself bogged down with things that really don't matter, plagued with self-doubt and unhelpful thoughts. It's time for a change.

The people you care about and who love you are all that matters. Not the stuff, the job, the car, the toys, the house or the designer labels. They're all replaceable. They don't mean anything.

Things don't matter, people do.

So I'm finding myself repeating words that I've heard many time before, but so often forgotten, caught up in the petty dramas of  daily modern life.

Don't sweat the small stuff. It really doesn't matter.

If you love somebody, let them know it. 

Live in the moment, and enjoy your life fully. You never know how long you have left!

Look for the joy and appreciate the "small" things, the love & friendships, the beauty of a sunrise, your child's smile. Because when you shift your perception and finally get things into perspective, you'll see they were actually the big things all along.

Do we really need an International Women's Day?

As you may know, yesterday was International Women's Day.

I was a little surprised to say in the least when I saw the image emblazened on the Google home page. It's not a day I've heard of before, and not one I celebrate as a matter of course.

I have to admit, as a modern western woman, I found the idea of a "women's day" a little patronising.  It got my back up rather. The energy of the day felt all wrong to me.

I for one do not consider myself a charity case because I'm a woman, or in need of a "special day" and I have to admit that I felt the righteous indignation rising in me when I found out about it.

I decided to research the history of the day, and sure enough it was originally called International Working Women's Day and had its origins in 1909 to support the very much oppressed women of the day, to help promote suffrage and equal rights for women.

All well and good, but is it still relevant in this day and age? Women aren't oppressed in my country. We have equal rights and equal opportunities. Do I really still need a "Day" to remember that we used to be 2nd class citizens, like a hundred years ago?

I spoke to some of my colleagues, to see how they felt about it, and opinions were divided. 

Some felt is was a wonderful opportunity to celebrate all things feminine, and enjoy a day of "girl power" but funnily enough, others, like myself (and interestingly all the men I spoke to) felt alienated, and saw it as rather patronising. The guys in particular didn't like it, because they felt it implied that men were vilified as oppressors of women.

Another point made was ironically from an equality point of view. There's no International Men's day, so why is there still a Women's day?

Does this sort of day still have a place in our modern world or is it just yet another outdated relic from another era?

The flip side of the coin, is that the day is used to highlight the plight of women less fortunate than  myself in other countries, who are still exploited, oppressed or abused because of gender inequality. 

Whilst I'm aware that sadly this is still an issue in many parts of the world, I can't help but feel the energy behind the day in question is a negative one, and it's not one that resonates with me. 

At the risk of being shot down in flames, I do feel it could be modernised to encourage people to celebrate and promote equality rather than making men out to be the "bad guys" for a day. 

How about a day that feels loving, includes everyone and encourages people to spread the love rather than dividing the genders once again, and putting people back into the old-fashioned camps of boys versus girls?

A more positive name like International Equality Day gets my vote. How about you?

Do What's Right ... For You

Doing what's right for you can be a difficult decision to make when you have a head full of shoulds and  you're used to putting other people and their opinions before your own - like me.

Many of us, women especially (I have to tell a lot of mothers off for this when they come to me for readings!) are very bad at putting ourselves first or doing what's right for us. Too busy fulfilling the role of dutiful wife, daughter or mother we do what we think we should rather than what's right for us.

Sometimes you may have some really hard choices to make in life, but if there's something you really need to do for yourself, for you, for your self development or for your higher purpose, then do it. You have to live your truth.

Even if it seems like everybody else in the world is telling you it's wrong, stupid, selfish or any other reason, that still doesn't matter one jot if you know in your heart that it's the right thing for you.

You are a spiritual being having a human experience, and you came here to follow your own path not anybody else's. Even if it seems like you're making a huge mistake, it's still your choice to do what's right for you. You never know, it may turn out to be the best thing you ever did!

I remember staying in a job I hated for almost 3 years because I was under pressure from a partner who told me I should stay there even though I knew it wasn't right for me and I was desperately unhappy and dying to leave.

Shortly after the relationship ended, I found myself in an appraisal meeting with my manager. I idly looked out of the 5th floor window at a beautiful November sunrise and realised that there was no reason why I still needed to be there.

"I don't have to be here!"

The words rang out in my head and I started grinning, unable to stop. I handed in my notice the very next day and never looked back. I had no job to go to, and colleagues and family warned me that it was "the wrong thing to do" but I just knew that it was right for me.

I left with no job lined up to go to, 2 weeks before Christmas. I'll admit that it was a nerve wracking few weeks, but I quickly found a much better and happier job for myself, with a hefty pay rise to boot, and ultimately I was the envy of my former colleagues.

Most people around me were surprised, but not me. I knew in my heart and soul that I was doing the right thing, and that everything would be alright, despite appearances to the contrary!

So please remember, you have to do what's right for you, and ultimately that will be what's right for everybody else too. They just might not see it that way yet, so you have to take the lead and live your authentic life.

If you would like some clarity in your life, contact me for a reading today helen@angelwingsholistics.com or check out my website www.angelwingsholistics.com

Let's find what's right for you...