Doing what's right
for you can be a difficult decision to make when you have a head full of shoulds and
you're used to putting other people and their opinions before your own -
like me.
Many of us, women
especially (I have to tell a lot of mothers off for this when they come to me for readings!) are very bad at
putting ourselves first or doing what's right for us. Too busy fulfilling the
role of dutiful wife, daughter or mother we do what we think we should rather than what's right for us.
Sometimes you may
have some really hard choices to make in life, but if there's something you
really need to do for yourself, for you, for your self development or for your
higher purpose, then do it. You have to live your truth.
Even if it seems
like everybody else in the world is telling you it's wrong, stupid, selfish or
any other reason, that still doesn't matter one jot if you know in your heart
that it's the right thing for you.
You are a spiritual
being having a human experience, and you came here to follow your own path not
anybody else's. Even if it seems like you're making a huge mistake, it's still
your choice to do what's right for you. You never know, it may turn out to be
the best thing you ever did!
I remember staying
in a job I hated for almost 3 years because I was under pressure from a partner
who told me I should stay there even
though I knew it wasn't right for me and I was desperately unhappy and dying to
leave.
Shortly after the
relationship ended, I found myself in an appraisal meeting with my manager. I
idly looked out of the 5th floor window at a beautiful November sunrise and
realised that there was no reason why I still needed to be there.
"I don't have
to be here!"
The words rang out
in my head and I started grinning, unable to stop. I handed in my notice the
very next day and never looked back. I had no job to go to, and colleagues and
family warned me that it was "the wrong thing to do" but I just knew that
it was right for me.
I left with no job
lined up to go to, 2 weeks before Christmas. I'll admit that it was a nerve
wracking few weeks, but I quickly found a much better and happier job for
myself, with a hefty pay rise to boot, and ultimately I was the envy of my
former colleagues.
Most people around
me were surprised, but not me. I knew in my heart and soul that I was doing the
right thing, and that everything would be alright, despite appearances to the
contrary!
So please remember,
you have to do what's right for you, and ultimately that will be what's right
for everybody else too. They just might not see it that way yet, so you have to
take the lead and live your authentic life.
If you would like some clarity in your life, contact me for a reading today helen@angelwingsholistics.com or check out my website www.angelwingsholistics.com
Let's find what's right for you...
This is so in alignment with where I am right now it can be hard to stand against the shoulda, they are so pervasive; but it feels awful when you allow them to control you. When you do what's right for you it feels like you're flying. Thank you for the reminder!
ReplyDeleteI have a daily battle with the shoulds in my head Claire! Glad to help :)
DeleteGreat article Helen, I don't hate my job but felt out of alignment recently because there were things I resented and wasn't looking forward to my days in the office, I wanted more time to spend for my coaching business, I did mentioned that I want to resign but I was asked to stay and we compromised on working conditions so it suits both parties. But at that moment I knew that it was a right decision and even though I didn't have a security for bold actions. Your article is a great proof of power of listening to your inner voice.
ReplyDeleteYou're so right. It's pretty easy to get caught up in a case of the shoulds, and the "I'm just going to do that when," too. I think it's hardest to deal with the shoulds when it come to family obligations.
ReplyDeleteThat is SO true. I like to think that I'm really good at being selfish, but then I find that I struggle with this in harder to see areas. For example, I work far too much - I LOVE my work so it's sometimes hard to define what "too much" is. But not having the time to read or paint or play means I'm letting my obligations to my clients and my work outweigh my obligations to myself. I think it's a lesson I'm always always going to have to be re-learning.
ReplyDelete